If a marriage is found to be null, i.e. a marriage is found to not exist, and there are also children, simply make the parents retake their marriage vows.
Or better yet, Simply make anyone applying for an annulment retake their marriage vows so that he or she is certain they are married.
And if the second time taking the vows doesn't work out any better than the first, make them do it again until they get it right.
If the point of annulment is not Catholic divorce, i.e. not a technical way of getting out of a marriage, then it follows that those involves should gladly take their marriage vows again so that they are married.
And if one of the parents refuses to take the marriage vow again, that is proof that what is wanted is a way out of the marriage.
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Think about it. - - - Those who we have known who have had invalid marriages, but wanted to be married did not get their marriages annulled. What they did instead was they got their marriages blessed so that they are married.
I know of a family with four children where the husband and wife were married three times.
The first time by a judge.
The second time by a schismatic priest of an independent chapel.
The third time by a priest with faculties in their diocese.
They didn't go to a marriage tribunal, get their marriage annulled, and go their separate ways because their marriage in front of a judge was invalid. What they did instead was they did their best to make sure they were married.
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Annulments are almost always initiated by a spouse who does not want to be married, not because the spouse thinks the marriage is invalid for some reason, but because the spouse wants out of the marriage and sees the annulment process a way of getting out of the marriage. What the spouse wants is a divorce.
Being a parent is a duty, and that duty supersedes the happiness of the parent. And even if the marriage is null, that does not preclude a parent's duty to his or her child. The parent's duty is to keep his or her children in a stable family with a mother and a father and so in turn the Church should demand that those who have an invalid marriage need to retake their marriage vows and live as a family.
The spouse seeking a Catholic divorce needs to grow up and and act like an adult, and the Church needs to demand that the spouse act like an adult.
Or course this likewise means that priests need to also start acting like adults by giving real and helpful advise versus their all to common wimp advise of taking the easy way out because they don't want to offend anyone.
If the Church is serious that divorce is extremely harmful, to wit:
"Divorce is immoral also because it intorduces disorder into the family and into society. This disorder brings grave harm to the deserted spouse, to children traumatized by the separation of their parents, and often torn between them and, because of its contagious effect which makes it truly a plague on society,"
Then it in turn follows that the Church needs to demand that Catholics not get a "Catholic divorce; and instead, those who do have children should be forced to retake their marriage vows.
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If you liked this post, you may like my others on the same subject:
The solution to the annulment scandal
The annulment scandal
Stressing the unitive aspect of marriage only makes the problem worse
Marry a hot Catholic babe with a 2-year long marriage contract and receive a guaranteed annulment because of "lack of due discretion" when the contract runs out
Never trust a priest to help you solve your marriage problems.
"The floor of hell is paved with the skulls of bishops" and of those who serve on their marriage tribunals because they are recklessly scandalizing our children, driving a wedge between our children and the Faith.
awesome. yes yes yes.
ReplyDeletepriests need to act like the responsible adults they are called to be and not coddle those spouses who simply want Out of their marriage.
amen.
Thank you Dr. Agbadi,
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